and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
