grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
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birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
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Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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