i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
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