That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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