that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.