We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
