How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
