I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize