I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Randomize
