I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize