What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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