he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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