I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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