Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
