and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
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Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
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