I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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