I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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