The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I will pee on everything he values.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
