it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
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4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
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A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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