Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize