New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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