Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
