its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
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I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
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You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.