OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them