the new term for farting is butt boxing.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
You're a waste of cheezeits
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
