what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
