But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
