But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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