You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
