You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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