so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
