Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Randomize
