Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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