Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
