the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
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Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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