is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
