woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
third nipple confirmed
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
