Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
