chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize