im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
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