My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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