hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only a mothe r could love this liver
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize