He asked me if I "almost moaned"
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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