can u get pink eye on your cock?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
