wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
