so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Randomize