remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
