This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
