areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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