Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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