Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize