if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
