you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I think I just sharted jello shots
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
