Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
